


Of Angels and Worries

by That1writer



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Late night talks of comfort is always nice, This is actually the first fic i have written in three years period, This is the first cr fic I have written despite watching for years, ig, post e111
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:00:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26698639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/That1writer/pseuds/That1writer
Summary: Beau has been awake in the late hours of the night, thinking about the events that have transpired lately. Despite it being late into the night, she finds herself at the lavender engraved door that leads to Yasha’s living space. Beauregard isn’t dumb. She has seen Yasha’s inner battles recently and hopes she can help her talk.
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett/Yasha
Comments: 8
Kudos: 118





	Of Angels and Worries

Beauregard Lionett is a smart woman, she is very insightful and, despite what some would say, very compassionate. 

So much has happened so fast and no one has mentioned the elephant in the room for fear of teetering the delicate balance of privacy and concern. One moment they’re on an island with the very real concern of losing memory of life before, then they end up fighting a fake god and get disturbing visions of a living, breathing city with nine eyes, and, wait… nine eyes? Mollymauk had something to do with that, but no, that’s for another time. Afterall, Travelercon was only a meer three days from that moment. The stress of everything the island threw at the nein topped with the cherry of finding Molly’s grave uninhabited and Jester seeing him in the snow was a lot to handle.

Beau noticed Yasha. She was so carefree on the island for lack of a better term. Her wings came out and she was so elated and excited, the most the nein have ever seen from her. Childlike glee emanated from her when she realized she could fly. Yet, she was sad. Well.. sad wouldn’t be the right term. Melancholic. 

Beau took note of her sleeping at the edge of the dome, the vague shape of her and her wife together in a meadow. Beau saw the distress on Yasha’s face when she couldn’t remember Zuala and Molly. And two days ago, the reveal of Mollymauk’s body, still alive. Yasha was the closest to Molly out of anyone, she was his best friend and soulmate. She didn’t see his death or his burial, the last time truly seeing his alive body was before she was taken along with Fjord and Jester. 

Beau remembered vividly, the rain creating mud on the hills as Veth and Caduceus were digging frantically, the feeling of the cold rain on her skin, no thunder to be heard, and the feeling of Yasha’s grip tightening. Besides the tighter hold, Yasha showed almost no emotion. Beau was almost afraid she would leave again. Almost.

It has been mulling over in Beau’s mind for the past two days. Sleep deprived and frustrated from not being able to connect those last few dots, Beau knocked on the door with the lavender flower etched into the wood. 

The door opened, Yasha’s silhouette taking up the majority of the opening.

“Oh, hello Beau. I, uh, it is quite late.” She looked over her shoulder, peering into the room. “I was not aware you would be coming, do you want to come sit?” 

Beau cleared her throat. “I can go. I don’t know why I am here I will be honest. I.. I will just go.”

“No no, you didn’t wake me. Come in, please.” 

“Oh, o-okay.”

Yasha’s living space was beautiful. It smelled of a mixture of petrichor, fresh grass, and flowers. It was almost as if they were outside before a storm.

The area was dimly lit, but beau could make out a book opened on the desk. She walked over to it and saw a fresh pressed purple flower. 

“Does it get better?” Beau asked. 

Yasha faltered. “I am afraid I do not know what you mean.” 

“The sadness. The loss.”

She let out a breath. “Oh. That.” Yasha went to find another chair to place near the desk and sit. 

“Sometimes. I mean, it is a different form. I don’t think it will ever go away exactly, but I think it transforms into something more bearable. Instead of feeling sad of what we may miss, we can reminisce over times spent together.”

There was a brief pause. Yasha was tracing the pressed flower gently with her fingertips. 

“What was she like?” 

The question took her by surprise and her hand stopped. A small, sad smile appeared on her face. 

“She was wonderful. Strong. Kind hearted and caring. Between the two of us, she was the smart one, but I was more cautious. It felt as if the world would melt away and we lived in a place with no arranged marriages, where we could be ourselves.” 

She turned to look at Beau, who was staring at her.  
“You would have loved her. You remind me of her sometimes.” Yasha gave a weak chuckle. “You get the same look in your eye as her when you focus on something.” 

Yasha moved her hand from the book to Beau’s, not clasping, just on it to give Beau the option of pulling back. 

Beau shifted her gaze to their hands and put her other hand on top of Yasha’s to hold and gave a comforting squeeze. 

“You always want to protect and look out for others, Yasha, but you don’t let yourself be taken care of.” Beau looked into her eyes, “It’s okay to break down the walls, shit, you probably need to more than any of us. You are the most caring person I have ever met.”

Yasha let out a shaky sigh and looked at their hands, then to the book.

“I know. I have been trying to open up more.” She looked at Beau. “Can I be honest? I am scared. I never said good bye to Molly and now we may have to face his body. I know it’s probably not him, but… I can’t help but hope? It’s ridiculous I know.” 

“No. It isn’t ridiculous to hope your best friend is alive. I can’t help but feel the same. I may not have been as close to him as you were, but he helped me grow, as stupid as that is.” 

Yasha shifted her weight in her chair. 

“So much has happened so fast. I felt like I was healing but it hurts very much.” 

“From what I have learned dealing with my father’s bullshit its that healing isn’t a straight path. Hell, I still have bad days sometimes. Just know we don’t think any less of you.”She smiled. “And, hey, think of when we first met. I was such an asshole. You know how much gold I owe you? A shit ton.”

They both laughed slightly. 

Yasha ducked her head for a moment then looked back up. Her eyes were teary but her face was sincere in her smile. “Thank you Beau.” 

Yasha’s thumb started caressing the knuckle on Beau’s hand. 

“Pfft, it’s, really I- it’s no big deal. You’re amazing, just hope you know that.” 

“Well, for what it’s worth, you’re pretty amazing too.”

Beau nervously laughed. 

“Yea…” 

Beau took a deep breath and got up from the chair. Though Caleb mentioned the tower being in a different dimension, the stained glass window depicting the storm had a faint light coming through. 

“It’s… pretty late. Thank you for talking with me.”

“Oh, yea. I guess it is. Please get some sleep, Beau. I know how hard you have been working, let yourself rest.” 

“I will. You too, yea?”

“Yes.”

There was a silence for a few moments. Neither one wanting to say good night, despite the knowledge of seeing each other in the morning.

“Okay well, good night, I guess.”

“Yes, good night.”

Beau turned to exit the room. She was mostly out the door when she heard Yasha say “Wait, Beau?”  
Beau stopped and looked back into the room. 

“Um, would it be alright if I asked for a hug?” Yasha said, sheepishly. 

Beau paused and nodded. She walked back into the room and embraced Yasha. 

Her head was just the right height to tuck into the crook of Yasha’s neck. Yasha’s arms encircled around her and she rested her head on Beau’s. Yasha was firm and somehow still soft. The warmth of her body and the comfort of the embrace made Beau never want to leave. 

Yasha took a deep breath and separated. “Thank you, I needed that. Good night, Beau.” She leaned down and placed a soft kiss to Beau’s forehead and smiled. 

“Good night, Yasha.” 

This time, Beau didn’t turn to look back, tired and content. She made her way to her room, past the living quarters, and plopped down on her soft bed after letting her hair down, only to dream of flowers and angels.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I somehow wrote this in an hr at 3 am because SOMEONE needs to talk to Yasha.


End file.
